Moving On: Day 9

Last night was particularly difficult. I should not spend too much time alone at night when it's raining. I had to go through some of my memories. People who get trapped in their thoughts know what it feels like to make themselves suffer like that.

That's one of the downsides of having an overactive imagination and an overthinking mind.

Today is a new day and I will continue looking for ways to keep myself busy.

Moving On: Day 8

Today, I am telling myself the reasons why I made the decision to let him go. I would be a hypocrite if I say that I am not hoping that maybe one day, he will go back to the person I fell in love with and maybe, just maybe, his priorities in life will then include me. I am hoping but I am not expecting.

So, in order for me to make progress in my life and start to focus on myself first, I had to make that decision. "Happiness can be defined as the fruit of the desire and ability to sacrifice what we want now for what we want eventually.", said Dr. Stephen Covey. I must always remember this since I am still aching and longing for what I had and what I expected. I know this will be good for me in the long run.

Moving On: Day 7

I would like to thank my family and the following because they made my Sunday more bearable:

1. "It"
2. "How to Get Away With Murder"
3. "Stranger Things"

I don't want it to be Monday yet but work is another welcome distraction.

Moving On: Day 6

It's the weekend and I couldn't help but imagine him spending time with her and taking her out on dates.

So, before my imagination gets the better of me, I go out and watch at Marvel movie with my mother and sister. "Thor: Ragnarok" was a great choice because it was funny and has a few cute guys.

So, there.

Moving On: Day 5

So far, I have coped in two ways:

1. Keep myself busy when I'm awake.

2. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep.

Moving On: Day 4

I think I am in the ANGER stage of grief.

I feel like a bottle fizzing and waiting to burst but I have not opened my cap yet.

I wait for the day that I will just explode and cry my eyes out. Maybe get drunk in the process, who knows? I hope to experience that day soon.

Moving On: Day 3

I often catch myself talking to myself and it's all good.

Yesterday, I started giving myself "pep talks". I found myself doing the following:

1. Look at the mirror during a shower and tell my reflection all the red flags that I ignored. I have to remind myself that this was expected and I am now suffering the consequences of my decisions and actions.

2. Close my eyes and turn off the lights when I am alone in the room. I remind myself that I am worth more than how I've been treated. I console myself in the hope that maybe, someone way better will love me the way I want to be loved. I think of the plans for myself in the near future.

I will repeat these processes until the ideas sink in.

Moving On: Day 2

It's always during the wee hours of the morning when I feel even sadder.

My mind's been reeling looking for reasons why it happened. Last night, I was really angry that I slept for 8 straight hours. I think that anger was good for my body. Maybe this is a phase I need to go through.

Moving On: Day 1

So far, I have already done the following:

1. Convince myself that I should be priority this time around.
2. Convince myself that I need peace of mind.
3. Convince myself that I deserve better than a halfhearted, long distance pseudo-relationship.
4. Tell a handful of friends to remind me that I should not settle.
5. Block him on Facebook.
6. Cry my eyes out.

Before today ends, I need to do the following:

1. Keep myself busy, busy, busy.
2. Delete all photos, chat conversations and personal Spotify playlists insipired by him.
3. Update my To-do list to remove all things that I want to do that included him.
4. Create a "Me Plan" that consists of a haircut, a gym membership and travel plans to name a few.
5. Get more quality sleep.