Cheers!

Earlier today, I spent some precious moments with most of my teammates. That was the last breakfast/get-together we will have as Team Vauxhall. Those people were part of my first team in the company where I work and I am grateful that I shared my first one year and seven months with them. Yes, we will still see each other at times, but not as often as we used to. So, to those who have been a part of Team Vauxhall, thank you so much for the memories!

Together, we are one of a kind.

Cheers to friendship!

Viva La Vauxhall!

You and I will meet again,

When we're least expecting it,

One day in some far off place,

I will recognize your face,

I won't say goodbye my friend,

For you and I will meet again.

-- Tom Petty

Summer 2010

I'm glad I was able to go out of town and visit the beach before rainy season begins. I had fun with my team mates/friends when we went to nearby Tagaytay, Cavite and Nasugbu, Batangas for some bonding, sun, sea, fresh air, food, booze, laughter, stories and memories.

Peeking inside the cave

Sun-kissed girls

Cool and clear water

Capturing moments

Happy morning boat ride

Team Vauxhall in Tagaytay

Click here for more pictures from my summer getaway!

For Friends...

... who turn my frown into a smile
... who listen to my silly stories
... who listen to my even sillier love songs
... who accept me for all my imperfections
... who adjust to my moods
... who understand my predicaments
... who are there when I need them the most
... who remember me even when I'm away
... who give thoughtful gestures
... who take care of me
... who know how to say the right things at the right time
... who fight for friendship and what it represents
... who work hard and play harder
... who are brutally honest
... who value my opinion
... who won't allow distance or time drift us apart
... who teach me how to love
... who are there when I fall
... who are still there when I get up
... who make life easier
... who make the world a better place


THANK YOU!!!

Universe

And, when you want something,
all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.
~ Paulo Coelho, "The Alchemist"


I am blaming the Universe for the pretty weird things that happened to me today. It was a choice between the past and the present (or possible future?). I made a choice and I have no regrets. (Note to self: Read private blog.)


I didn't intend to be in this position. I didn't force myself to feel this way. Sometimes, life has a cruel way of letting me learn my lessons. I have to quit over-analyzing. I have to stop worrying. I just have to continue being my fabulous self (Hahaha!) and concentrate on work.


I am partly letting go-- not of him, but of myself. It's like being bonded in chains. It's suffocating. Everyday is a puzzle. He's the reason but I am to blame. So, I'll just give him what he wants. If it's time, he can have it. I am not planning to hang on more than I intend to or want to. I'll let him enjoy what he needs to enjoy. That's what he wants. Me? I have to move on... but I will continue to think about him, care for him and possibly even love him... more than he'll ever know.

Waiting

"Patience is a virtue" or "Time is gold"?


A few days from now, a good friend of mine is leaving for London. A few months from now, another good friend is coming back from the States. People come and go. People pass me by. I have always been here-- waiting for things to occur, waiting for life to happen, waiting for time to pass and waiting for my chance to come. I know I should do something, but I always play safe. Do I remain here in my place and let opportunities pass me by?


I have grabbed the chances I can get, but there are certain chances that require great risks. My so-called career is going smoothly. I don't regret any big decisions I have made. Recently though, I realized that when it comes to romance and matters of the heart, I am scared. I don't want to end up broken-hearted again. Am I already jaded? Or am I just playing safe?


The thoughts have been killing me. The mystery is eating me day after day. I hate this feeling of not knowing. Should I ask and risk everything or should I wait for the universe to conspire in achieving my heart's desire? Hahaha! Or maybe, I should just stay the same-- crazy ol' me. Always waiting. Always here.

Starting Anew

Sometimes, things or people aren't what they seem.


Sometimes, when a door closes, another window opens.


Sometimes, when a chapter ends, another one begins.


Somehow, I can't help but feel disappointed. I have to blame myself for expecting too much. Life isn't perfect. People don't always stay. In as much as I would want to and I would gladly exert all my effort, some things just don't last. It's sad.


Good thing, there's always a diversion. When people come and fade away in life, new faces will appear and offer a smile. New personalities will emerge. Sometimes, they remind you of the old ones who fade away. Sometimes, they're a welcome change. They won't replace the old ones. They never will, but it is refreshing. It reminds me of the changes in season. Right now, I am having a cold winter, but I know there will be spring soon.


My horoscope today states:
CANCER
Your more self-nurturing instincts are coming to the forefront today, and while it might send you down an anti-social path for a while, in the end it's a very good thing to start listening to your own needs right now. Start forgiving yourself for what you may have done, and think about where you want to take things from here -- instead of wondering why things don't always end up being the way you wanted them to be. It's a time of reflection, but it's also a time of healing.


Anti-social path, here I come? Nah. Hahaha! Healing it is. =)

*sniff*

A lot of people at work resigned from work today. They are due to be trained to another account in a few days. I lost almost half of my team, some of my friends and a couple of really close pals. It felt different at the office last night. People were still working albeit less calls due to the U.S. holiday, but there were tears, blank stares and dream-like states. I cannot exactly pinpoint if it was due to sadness or uncertainty or shock or anger. We snapped a lot of pictures hoping that the camera will capture the memories we will forever treasure.


This is it. The end of the account is inevitable. A few days from now, I will make that decision too-- leave the account and transfer to another one. If or when I make that choice, I will leave some of my friends. Although I will still see some of them, it won't be the same anymore.


It's high time again to jump off the cliff. I read somewhere that when one makes a decision, one does not leave one foot on the cliff and one foot hanging in the air. Making a decision is taking the plunge, however risky it may be. The success there would be to conquer it all.


So, I wish each and everyone of us goodluck! It has been nice working with all of you. Some memories may not be as nice as the others, but there are lessons learned and friendships created. That's what matters. =)


SK SK

Whirls and Twirls

After the whirlwind week last week, I have caught some sleep during the weekend and I'm back to my zombie mode at work. I can't imagine I went through a post-birthday party, a relative's death, a sort-of family reunion, a friend's despedida party, a mother's day celebration and some work in-between in a span of a few days. There were mixed emotions, mixed drinks and mixed expressions. Maybe that's why I also feel mixed up today. Hah! But then there's this guy... this darn guy I couldn't stop thinking... umm... never mind. I am actually trying my best to forget him.


Anyway, here are some pics from Day's post-birthday party. Click this to view the entire album. Thank you, Day for the pictures. =)



posing with the donuts



pretty waves



a toast to friendship


Before I forget, (belated) Happy Mother's Day to all mothers out there! I know we're nothing (but void? hehe!) without you. Love you, Mama! Mwah! I hope you like our "gift", Hehe! I am not sure where I can grab some pics for Gabe's despedida party (I'm gonna miss you, Gabe! Huhuhu!) We will all be waiting for you! Oh, and I am looking forward to next weekend. I hope I can see some of my cousins and we can hang out together. It's been a while really. The entire family is also planning to go home to Bacolod City (after 11 years or so!) next month. I just have to think where I can get the money for that... Oh wow. Hahaha! I guess I have to work my arse off some more. =)

Summer Lovin'

Finally! The vacation we have all been waiting for happened last April 19-20, 2008. Some friends from work and I went to Coralview Resort in Morong, Bataan. It was my first time there and I have to say, despite the glitches, the trip still created warm memories. I have no camera so I'm grabbing some pics from Day's Multiply album and Maroi's Multiply album.


I created my own one in Multiply so I can share the pictures with my family and other friends. Here are some samples:




getting ready to leave



going to the beach



the Bear family picture



on the boat



on the water


Click here to view more pics at my Multiply album.

Rainy Days

Despite the summer heat outside, it seems like hard rain has been pouring over my life the past weekend.


Sunday was relatively peaceful. I attended Palm Sunday mass at Greenbelt church. I have started going to mass regularly for the past 3 Sundays now. After mass, I spent some time alone reading a book. That place is beautiful. Sunday mornings, when there is no mall crowd but just church-goers, give me quiet moments in that otherwise noisy mall. I got home at midday and I was able to catch on sleep.



Greenbelt church


When I woke up Monday morning, I learned from my sister that my grandmother was rushed to the hospital again. She was vomiting blood. I had the idea that it was severe gastric ulcer because of her medical history. My mother flew to Bacolod Monday afternoon to visit my Lola. Lola has started pooping blood as well. As of this blog entry, she is in the ICU and has been transfused with 5 bags of blood. I hope and pray that everything is going to be alright. Whatever God chooses to do for my grandmother, I just pray for strength for my family. When in stress, Mama doesn't sleep and eat. My siblings and I have been reminding her to put some food in her stomach otherwise her own ulcer may be aggravated.


Let me rewind a little bit. Monday morning was my sister's Oath Taking ceremony. My parents were supposed to go. Of course, it was a milestone for her. I can remember my own Oath Taking a few years back and it was an unforgettable moment. Because of what happened to my Lola, my mother decided not to go. I was going to take her place instead. I saw my sister's sad face and I knew I had to convince my mother to go. Even if it means us (my brother and I) buying her tickets for her and bringing her luggage to SMX (oath-taking ceremeny venue) so she can go directly to the airport. Since my mother is just going to take advantage of cheaper priced tickets, she said she had to be at the airport really early and that means missing my sister's oath taking. I was really disappointed and I was angry too. My first thought was, how can my mother choose to go to the province over my sister's Oath Taking ceremony? Her decision just goes to show what her priorities are. So, we went on with it. The ceremony was, for the most part, touching. I can't help but think that my mother was supposed to be in my place beside my father. But after the updates that we are getting from Bacolod, with all the things going on with my grandmother, I felt guilty of thinking that way. Yes, my mother had a choice and I just realized she would have loved to be there for my sister but my grandmother can't wait. I can just imagine how torn she was then. She had to make a decision. I am so sorry.



Papa and sis






with Papa



with sis


Monday evening, I received another sad news. Tien Dalao, a good friend from way back in my Montalban (Rizal) rotation days, a very lively and sunny personality, a smart, young, creative, sexy and sassy girl, a gifted Occupation Therapist, someone who would never fail to light up another person's day, passed away from pneumonia complications. I was flabbergasted! I mean, she just posted some comments on my blog a few weeks back. OMG. I felt numb. I was in a meeting that time and I just felt like I was lost for a moment. I didn't know how to react. I asked when the burial date is and my college classmate told me she had no idea and we have to call the funeral home. OMG. I mean, how could that happen? It's summer already and I was looking forward to her pictures on her blog! I wanted to see more pictures of her, the people and places she would have seen. I can imagine her surfing or just being a beach bum somewhere remote and untouched. I'm going to miss her and the way she always makes people, especially her special "kids" happy.



pretty girl



Tien in Batanes


I stole these pics (some of her latest) from her Xanga site. I hope she doesn't mind. I know she's probably smiling where she is right now. She has touched a lot of lives. Her mission in this world was complete. I am going to miss her wonderful pictures and deep thoughts. I am going to miss her.


Tonight, I am going back to work. I will momentarily forget the craziness the weekend brought me. I will now have to focus on the uncertainties of my so-called career. Life must go on as they say. But I know it will never be the same again..

70's Night Out

Despite the problems at home, the toxicity of work and the uncertainties of life in general, last Monday night was a date I had been looking forward to. We just waited for the perfect setting and the lack of work schedule clashes. I don’t want to go into details but I can still vividly remember the memorable and mostly funny moments of that night. It has been a while since I went out at night for fun and it was a welcome change. Besides, it was one Sponge Cola gig I don't wanna miss.


We bought a really late birthday present for Chris. I know last year's Star Wars Trilogy poster present was still much cooler but then again, this year's was just as sweet. This was his reaction when he saw it.



Oh Sh*t!


Hahaha! The gig was a short one. It was a slow set but I like that-- less rock-and-roll-y. My sis even missed it but she surely enjoyed the "after party". We had short talk with the band members but mostly with Yael and Chris. For those who have been asking me if they're nice in person, yes they are REALLY nice. I hope we get to watch another gig soon. Less crowd, more talk.


Oh I haven't tasted the Stormtrooper chocolate cupcakes but they sure smelled good!






Sponge troopers



Yael on vocals


For more info about the personalized cupcakes (they are cute, aren't they?), just go to Gel's Multiply site. All photos courtesy of Ian Roxas (thank you!). =)

Rollercoaster Weekend

Saturday, 26 January


It was my transition day off. We're going to have a different schedule at work. I had brunch with some of my friends from work because I won't be seeing some of them for the meantime because of the changes in work schedule. We ate at the Seafood Market in Macapagal Highway. It was really fun. The food was great and we even had a chance to listen to some of my friends sing in the videoke. Of course, it won't be complete without wacky photo ops. Click this to view the album.






After the brunch, I met with Ian and my sis in nearby Mall of Asia. We were planning to watch a movie but then we're going to miss the sunset in Manila Bay, so we skipped it and hung out in the bay area instead. It was way cheaper too. Haha! Watching the sun set was like witnessing a few seconds of miracle. Imagine that beauty happening everyday and we are just oblivious to its presence. I couldn't get enough pictures. Click this to view the album. Ian's pictures can be found here.







After that we strolled around and decided to check out the nearby Global Fun Carnival. I really wanted to go on the ferris wheel but then I wouldn't want to get a ride-all-you-can ticket because my stomach can't take the abrupt changes in position for some rides. It was still fun when we explored it.


Sunday, 27 January


It was my father's 66th birthday! Yay! We ate lunch at his fave resto. It has been so long since we did that. We were all so full so we decided to stroll around the nearby mall. My father treated himself to a movie and we just window-shopped. Click here to view the album





We were all having fun when my Ma received a call from the province telling her my Lola is in critical condition. She lost consciousness. I am not sure what happened but she is going to undergo tests, that's for sure. My mother was actually planning to visit her this coming March but because of what happened, she went home immediately, called her relatives there, took some money from our supposed-to-be rent payment and got a ticket. She's in Bacolod City now. I think the plane landed an hour ago. Another sudden change happened in our lives. We don't know how long my Ma's gonna stay there or how my Lola is. We're still waiting for news.


Today, 28 January


I woke up really early today. My father hadn't slept yet because he was anxious too. I was just glad it's still my day off or else I couldn't concentrate at work. I'm also glad we were able to take some pictures. The camera couldn't hide the happiness on our faces. I was just thinking about how unpredictable life is and how it is necessary to live life each day as if it were your last. At my age, it seems difficult but then again, it wouldn't hurt to try.

Midday Stroll

I sacrificed some sleep a couple of days ago to be with my friends from work. I miss hanging out with them and since I'm out of the office early, another friend and I had to kill time before the rest of the gang could get out of the office.


Since it was too early for mall hours, we went to Banchetta in Emerald Avenue. It was similar to Salcedo Market, where we often go during weekends after shift, but the space is more cramped and there are less choices. Good thing was I was able to buy a Jack Skeleton skinny tie and shoelaces. I'm sure my sister was glad! Haha! After breakfast, we killed more time and went on our way to meet our friends in Serendra. We ate lunch in Conti's, had desert in Sonja's cupcakes then strolled for a while. We just pigged out and it was fun despite the heat! I wanted to go back there at night when it's not so hot and I can probably try Xocolat's famous vodka.



click picture to view album


I just miss these moments and I hope I could experience more of that soon. :)

Kantabataan

I was on leave last Saturday (November 10). My sis and I got invited to the Globe Kantabataan Grand Finals in the SM Mall of Asia Music Hall. I missed watching live bands perform on stage and I was not disappointed. I had fun! Thanks to my friends (Ian and Chris) who made it special for us. Congratulations to the finalists! You are all winners for me. Keep up the good work. For more pictures (including Sponge Cola, Imago and Hale performances), just click the picture below:



Suitcase 101
grand champions being interviewed by Patty Laurel


Enjoy! Just make sure to ask permission before grabbing our pics. =)

Bonded

The wedding ceremony I witnessed yesterday made me a little less jaded on my outlook in marriage. Nowadays a wedding is only a signing of a piece of paper and marriage is like a game. Get married out of convenience or out of shame and embarrassment. Try it out and if it doesn't work, game's over. Yesterday was different. My friends (also my officemates) attended a very beautiful ceremony and it was obvious that both their families really took part in it to make it successful. Rarely do I see a young couple in love and ready to face the challenges of married life with God as their number one source of strength. Also rarer is the fact that either family is willing to merge with one another and accept their differences out of respect.


They're one of the most selfless couples I've ever known. They're both talented musicians and active in their church. They even visited the hospital when my father was in the ICU and offered their prayers. It was so sincere that my mother cried. Right then and there I knew that what they have is different from the lovers (and relationships) that I've known. It's not just physical or emotional. Their bond is way beyond that. They share something spiritual and even when they prayed together, it felt like they were in sync with each other. I'm happy for them. I wish them all the wonderful things ahead. I know they will be great parents to the future children.



the newlyweds



the attendees


Thank you, Caris and Vijho. Again, congratulations and best wishes! *hugs*

Life Goes On

Life continues for most of us.


I've been working for the past week with only 3-4 hours of sleep a day. I'm glad I took last Friday off. I have yet to catch up on sleep so I am really looking forward to the weekend. A couple of days ago I had a presentation and an interview for the supervisory position I'm applying for. Wish me luck on the results. For those who are concerned, my father was out of the ICU last Sunday and is now better. He actually wanted to get out of the hospital but due to the bills, they won't allow him to be discharged yet. Meds and bills are burning holes in our already empty pockets. My sibs and I would probably work for the next couple of years or so just paying off debts but I'm sure we'll get there. I'm just grateful my father is doing well.


I got this quote from my sister:
Don't count your friends on a sunny day when the sky is blue and laughter is abundant. Instead, wait for a storm when the clouds are dark and smiles are scarce. When someone stands beside you and lifts your spirits to the sky, then you'll know who deserves to be called a friend.


I would like to thank the people who shared their thoughts, prayers and help in any way possible. Prayers are powerful and I'm happy ours are being heard. It just goes to show that during the tough times, one would know who really and truly cares.


Sometimes, a simple "thank you" is not enough to show how grateful we are. This is one of those times. But still I say, thank you from the bottom of our hearts!

Long For Escape

I badly needed a change in routine. I'm burning out from work and it shows in my quality scores these past few days.


My sis and I had a chance to don our Harry Potter costumes again before the New Worlds sci-fi and fantasy convention in October. Hogwarts Philippines (a.k.a. Pinoy Harry Potter), along with other fandoms, were invited to talk a bit about cosplaying (cosplay: short for costume play). I had to sacrifice my sleep time yesterday (slept only for 3 hours!!!) but it was worth it.


A TV program on one of the local channels asked us to wear our costumes. We met up at Fandom Cafe yesterday afternoon. There were a few people who showed probably because it's a weekday. The program was also able to film cosplayers from Star Wars Philippines and 501st Legion Philippine Outpost. It was a whole lotta fun!


We long for escape
Let the memory take shape
For the heroes we often see
I don't know if it's me or the movies we've seen
I don't remember as well as I should...*








I know some people don't understand how it feels to be a part of something like this. People may have misconceptions about us and some even result to discrimation or scorn. Some people misunderstand or don't want to understand. Others may not even care at all. I don't blame them. Besides, we can't please everyone.


Throughout the years, friendships evolve and sometimes die a natural death. It is sad. Some friends are still there despite the changing times and the growing up. For that I'm glad.


I've probably blogged about this before and still, I'll type it again-- I'm glad I found a place where I know my so-called geekiness belongs. I have this outlet now for my passions and I get to meet friends in the process-- people with almost similar, if not the same, capacity to be a fan or fanatic. Hurrah! :)


* lyrics from the song "Movie" by Sponge Cola
(This ought to be a paid advertisement. Hehehe! Peace. ;p)