Thursday, August 30, 2007

Life Goes On

Life continues for most of us.

I've been working for the past week with only 3-4 hours of sleep a day. I'm glad I took last Friday off. I have yet to catch up on sleep so I am really looking forward to the weekend. A couple of days ago I had a presentation and an interview for the supervisory position I'm applying for. Wish me luck on the results. For those who are concerned, my father was out of the ICU last Sunday and is now better. He actually wanted to get out of the hospital but due to the bills, they won't allow him to be discharged yet. Meds and bills are burning holes in our already empty pockets. My sibs and I would probably work for the next couple of years or so just paying off debts but I'm sure we'll get there. I'm just grateful my father is doing well.

I got this quote from my sister:
Don't count your friends on a sunny day when the sky is blue and laughter is abundant. Instead, wait for a storm when the clouds are dark and smiles are scarce. When someone stands beside you and lifts your spirits to the sky, then you'll know who deserves to be called a friend.

I would like to thank the people who shared their thoughts, prayers and help in any way possible. Prayers are powerful and I'm happy ours are being heard. It just goes to show that during the tough times, one would know who really and truly cares.

Sometimes, a simple "thank you" is not enough to show how grateful we are. This is one of those times. But still I say, thank you from the bottom of our hearts!

Sunday, August 26, 2007

Prayers Needed

This is a public plea.

Our father was rushed to the ER last Friday afternoon. My father is diabetic. He had a seizure and nearly died. His kidney and heart are failing him as a complication to his diabetes. He's been in the ICU since then and the cardiologist is advising against letting him out of the ICU because his heart cannot beat normally on its own yet. He has a temporary pacemaker and needs to be constantly monitored.

Now, he will undergo tests to rule out prostate cancer because it runs in the family and he bled when he tried to pee. Your prayers are needed. I know how strong prayers are and I hope you join me, my family and friends in praying for my father. Thank you very much in advance.

with my Papa during his birthday

If you happen to know a philanthropist or you are one, financial help is greatly appreciated too. Our financial resources are really low as of the moment. *sigh*

Thursday, August 23, 2007


click to view original image

We all go through changes. These transitions would often, if not always, require adjustments. Adjusting would mean altering the state of being and even the routine. If I had autism or severe OCD (obsessive-compulsive disorder), my world would be falling apart. Well, I'm keeping an open mind. If a transition is not as natural as changing clouds into rain, then somehow, these transitions we go through can be difficult-- like changing the status of a couple from lovers to friends.

Some say it's impossible for former lovers to be friends but I'm giving it my best shot. I've already gone through the most awkward and uncomfortable first step (after 5 months of sort-of estrangement), but I think I'm gonna be ok. We're gonna be ok. It's like not letting it all go because I'm holding on to something precious. Yes, I still have my selfish side. *insert evil laugh*

Would it have been easier if we didn't just "fade silently into the night"? What if we fell apart because of some ubiquitous reason such as a third party? Would it have been easier if we broke up because he made me really angry and made me mad enough to stay away? Would it be ok after crying or shouting or throwing things away like some people do? Maybe it's all a matter of perspective. Maybe it's all the same. Whatever the reason, falling apart in any way is still as tough as it gets.

Monday, August 20, 2007


Y Speak on Studio 23 was the TV program I was referring to. It was shown last Saturday. It's just us goofing around in costumes. My sis and I are not cosplayers. We just like to wear our Hogwarts uniforms, that's all. :)

Thank you Rej for posting the Youtube link. :)

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Stars Say...


You can't be there all the time to cater the needs of everyone around you. There's no reason to feel bad about this. You have your own needs too.

I just hope they know this so that they'll stop making me feel guilty. I have always been providing. Is it a sin to think of myself every once in a while?

* Lesson for the day:
Never snoop around people's private things or you'll just end up disappointed and/or very very mad.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Friday, August 10, 2007

Long For Escape

I badly needed a change in routine. I'm burning out from work and it shows in my quality scores these past few days.

My sis and I had a chance to don our Harry Potter costumes again before the New Worlds sci-fi and fantasy convention in October. Hogwarts Philippines (a.k.a. Pinoy Harry Potter), along with other fandoms, were invited to talk a bit about cosplaying (cosplay: short for costume play). I had to sacrifice my sleep time yesterday (slept only for 3 hours!!!) but it was worth it.

A TV program on one of the local channels asked us to wear our costumes. We met up at Fandom Cafe yesterday afternoon. There were a few people who showed probably because it's a weekday. The program was also able to film cosplayers from Star Wars Philippines and 501st Legion Philippine Outpost. It was a whole lotta fun!

We long for escape
Let the memory take shape
For the heroes we often see
I don't know if it's me or the movies we've seen
I don't remember as well as I should...

rebels versus jedi biker scout Rej me and Harry's birthday poster my sis and Harry's birthday poster

me and TK-2342 my sis and TK-2342 Chris and Rej

I know some people don't understand how it feels to be a part of something like this. People may have misconceptions about us and some even result to discrimation or scorn. Some people misunderstand or don't want to understand. Others may not even care at all. I don't blame them. Besides, we can't please everyone.

Throughout the years, friendships evolve and sometimes die a natural death. It is sad. Some friends are still there despite the changing times and the growing up. For that I'm glad.

I've probably blogged about this before and still, I'll type it again-- I'm glad I found a place where I know my so-called geekiness belongs. I have this outlet now for my passions and I get to meet friends in the process-- people with almost similar, if not the same, capacity to be a fan or fanatic. Hurrah! :)

* lyrics from the song "Movie" by Sponge Cola
(This ought to be a paid advertisement. Hehehe! Peace. ;p)

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Have You Ever?

Have you ever felt like you were forced in a situation you never really want to be a part of in the first place?

Have you ever felt like crying even when people around you are laughing and having fun?

Have you ever felt like wanting to be alone hoping that spending time with yourself can change everything?

Have you ever felt like holding back an idea because of fear of what others might say?

Have you ever felt like suppressing a feeling because of insecurities and doubts that the feeling is going to be validated?

Have you ever felt like you are trapped in a maze and there's no way out?

Have you ever felt like you're going in circles and you don't really know what your destination is?

Have you ever felt lonely without knowing the reason why?

Have you ever felt like nobody understands and the person who possibly can is not there for you?

Have you ever felt like life has no purpose or meaning?

The ultimate question is a bit melodramatic, I know. If you answered "yes" to all or some of these questions, I understand how you feel. I thought I've become numb but screw sensitivity when all I want to do is get away from it all... Tomorrow is another day. May it be better than today.