Sunday, January 16, 2005

hanging in there

This week drained a lot of my energy.

I've ignored some of the things happening at work, but when it comes to money matters, I don't want other people to stomp on me especially when I am trying my best to work in a job I don't even consider a career.

The politics I can live with since I've been through that with the previous company. I've also come to accept that the HR is one of the worst I've worked with. I've also gotten used to disputes in payroll every pay period. (Yeah, almost everytime I get my payslip, I dispute a mistake in accounting.) Then there are promises they can't keep. Then the sudden, inconsiderate changes in schedules. Lately was the tax exemption. It was clear that during training, I filed for head of the family with one dependent. I've often wondered why my taxes are always that huge. Then I learned that they placed me in the single tax exemption. (For those not familiar with taxes, just imagine at least PhP13,000 of what I earned this past year will never be given back to me because of their mistake.)

I rant but I rant because I have a reason to. I earned that, fair and square. It's my money. It's them who's not doing their job. Then I learned that these people are actually not accepting criticisms. (I mean, how can they improve if they don't wanna accept that they're making mistakes, right?) If they hear me complain, they'll make life more miserable for me.

It's some sort of a deja vu. I'm tempted to get out of here. You'll probably think I'm repeating what I did last year. Maybe. But I was never sorry I made that decision. Maybe it's just tough to last in a job that I don't wanna do.

So, I've told my Ma that I'm willing to sacrifice a few more years working in a callcenter until my sister graduates, gets a job and helps with the finances. That's approximately three more years of my life. After that, I told her, I will do what I want to do. I will work as a PT if I still want to. I will go back to school if I want to. I will find my true career.

But at that time, I'll be almost thirty. So, what happened to almost 30 years of my life?

A few weeks from now, I'll probably be in another office environment. I won't make hasty decisions if I don't have a Plan B. I'll have to find a work offering a higher pay and better benefits. I don't care. I have a goal to achieve. I'll probably be wasting my time right now, but then again, I've tried, but fate has its way of putting me in this position. So, I'll just have to hang in here for a moment, until it allows me to go to somewhere I'm meant to be.

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