Then I am still and wait here in the silence,
Until you come and sit a while with me...
(You Raise Me Up)
I wish I am able to do that, but then what I could do is just steal a few hours in my day and pretend I'm in another place and time. I may read a book or watch a movie or stay in the bedroom and stare at nothing while listening to mellow or angsty songs or maybe get good company and goof out.
Yesterday after shift, I went with a few friends and pigged out in this seafood resto and I had a bottle of SanMig Light before 11 in the morning. After sharing laughs, sentiments and stories, we went to a videoke booth in a nearby mall and made more damage to our vocal chords (surprise surprise!). I also played hoops in Timezone for a short while since I am not tall to shoot hoops in a real basketball court (haha!). Oh yes, it was just a short time but during those moments I had fun.
I wish that feeling of escaping from reality would last forever, but now I'm back to the real world. It's a slow Sunday but I'm feeling the pressures again of being the family breadwinner plus he-who-must-not-be-named is making me feel lost again and it hurts. It may seem cowardly but I wish I could just get away.
10 comments:
Your mind and heart deserve some state of peace and rest every now and then. And after all that you've been working for as the family breadwinner, you deserve some respite. Why don't you fly to somewhere you've never been to before? It might change your life and I'm sure as hell it'll be fun!
Thanks for your thoughts, Mark. I know it's gonna be a lot of fun. I've always wanted a vacation but I always end up thinking about the finances it's gonna cost me. Then I would feel guilty because I should have used it for my family's needs instead. It's hard to be selfish when I'm the only one they can count on, you know. I hope maybe someday I could do that.
i know what you mean. last summer i bought tickets for a trip to palawan with my mom 4 months ahead because i know i need a break, plus it was a P10 fare. i ended up going alone coz my mom backed out, but it was still one of the the best times i've had. alone with myself, i rediscovered me. karen, when you find the time, or when you see a promo for a low fare, close your eyes, pick a place, and buy a ticket. you deserve it. and more so, it will be worth it:)
wish ko rin yung wish mo...i guess lahat tayo gusto talaga ng pahinga from everything...
sounds like you need a vacation :) but then, you're saying that you'd feel guilty for taking one since you're the bread-winner of the family? hmm...i think there are other ways to relax and unwind that won't exactly cost you much. why not go to a spa or a massage parlor? it'll help soothe your tired muscles and relax your soul. there's a massage center in Mall of Asia that doesn't really cost that much....P299 for a 45minute massage...if am not mistaken, it's called the Big Apple Massage Center :)
I always thought of traveling into different places without the use of money. But the fact is, we live in a capitalist society, where everything involves money. Hayy...
moonbeam&sunshades: Thank you for the suggestion. I read it in your blog. I hope one of these days, I could do that too.
anonymous: Sana magkatotoo wishes natin di ba? :)
jaz: Maybe I just need a change of environment. Oh yeah and I've been wanting a full-body massage/spa for years now and I still haven't had the funds for that. Hopefully before the year ends...
jv: So true...
KK!
i liked this post. i just came from a trip and again, i am procrastinating on writing about it. i want it to last forever and ever.
sigh.
i wish you more time with yourself & with your loved ones.
don't feel guilty when you take a vay-cay. feel guilty when you are working too much, ok.
huggys,
*T*
Thanks *T* for those wonderful words of wisdom (WWW? Hehe!) I do hope one of these days I can be like you-- live life to the fullest as if without a care on the world (emphasis on "as if"). I hope we get to hang out often so you can rub off those vay-cay moments you've experienced. :)
how i wish to escape reality as well... :)
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