Tuesday, June 17, 2003

Give up or hold on?

When I got to work today, an officemate asked me what happened to my eyes. I told him my eyes are sympathizing with the rainy weather we have today. (But in truth, I think the weather is sympathizing with me.)

If I only knew how tough it is to handle and maintain a relationship, I would not have gotten into one in the first place. Now I'm thinking if the love and special moments are worth the hurt and problems we are encountering. Not to mention that I am a non-believer of long distance relationships and he is far away from me now. Plus the fact that he may be leaving for abroad sooner than I ever will. Aargh!

Like a friend said, I would have to think about it and pray about it if I'm giving up or not. I just spoke to him over the phone tonight and when he was about to let go, I held on. I am not giving up.

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Anyways, the "meeting" went ok last night. It seems life he was "shocked" (I can't think of a stronger word for his reaction) when he learned what transpired in my life for the past months. I guess he does not know me that much since he never expected I would do the things I did. At the same time, I also realized I knew him well since I expected what news he told me regarding his current lifestyle. Oh well. If my stories have affected him somehow, I don't think I care anymore. I cared before, but not now. Let him decide what he does with his life.

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