Not many calls today. It's Labor Day in the U.S.

I have the Monday syndrome again. I feel lazy here at work. But I'm proud I was not late. I watched "The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers" VCD earlier with my sis. I had a loadful of Orlando Bloom since last Saturday we also watched "Pirates of the Caribbean".

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I learned that one of my friends will be getting married (civil) this March before they go to New York. Her fiancé will undergo an operation there. Then they plan of getting married (church) in June. She'll be a June bride! *sigh* I can still recall two years ago when we got to know each other. She is actually a year younger than me. A few months ago she was whining that she doesn't have a boyfriend.

Then after that they are going to Singapore to live there since her husband-to-be got a great job offer there. I told her she is lucky. At least she found a man who loves her and they can start a family since he can afford to have one.

I am happy for her.

I also told her that they are both lucky to live a life like that. And I mean, really live... not just survive. I wonder what happened to me for me to reach this point in my life. Is it because I gave up on my dreams a long time ago. Or because I never strived perfection anymore when I started just accepting what life brings to me. Will I be satisfied staying where I am when I know I am not happy? But how will I change my life when everytime I start planning it, people and circumstances just don't cooperate with me? What do I need to do? Or do I need to do something? Or will I just wait for things to happen and change? I feel so helpless and hopeless.