Over-analysis

Had my share of fresh air last weekend. I did not go OT since apparently there was no demand for additional manpower last weekend. I had to rest but I will be having lower pay this coming payday. That's ok.

We had a long talk this weekend. About him and his problems about his family, then about me and my problems. He gave me valuable advice. I think I have shared more things to him in a span of about 6 hours compared to what I shared to most of my friends--- like what happened when I was in elementary that made me decide to spend my high school life buried in school books just to please my parents... and what happened when I was in high school that made me decide I should have fun in college, but I never had that much fun since my course was demanding as hell... He got to know me better and vice versa. It felt good to open up to someone.

Then he when I asked him whether he thinks our relationship had a purpose or direction. He told me he knows I have to work abroad and he has other plans for his career too. But I was surprised when he opened up the subject of marriage. I already knew he was looking at a future alone and without a companion, but I never knew our relationship can make him change his mind. But then again, we both are not ready for the seriousness of matrimony since we can hardly take care of the relationship we have now.

Anyways, all was ok until tonight when I called him to ask how he was doing. He said he is watching TV and is about to sleep. Then I heard voices in the background telling my instinct that there is some kind of a party out there. Then I asked him. There was no need to lie since I would understand. He has male friends and they want to get together and talk and drink sometimes. But he does not have to cover it up. How can I trust him if he gives me reason to doubt?

Then after two days of serenity, I'm mad at him again. I'm at work already and he keeps calling. Of course I won't get to answer my mobile. He left a message that they just came when I called so he did not get to tell me first. Actually, the reason why I called him was that he was sending me messages that made me think either he is too sleepy or he is drunk. Then after a while he told me he just drank one beer. But then I thought his friends just arrived, right? Does 1 and 2 make 2? I don't think so.

I can be a very good psychiatrist or private detective. I have this tendency to over-analyze things. Maybe that's my problem.

And though the odds say improbable
What do they know
For in romance
All true love needs is a chance
And maybe with a chance you will find
You too like i
Overjoyed, over loved, over you
~Stevie Wonder, "Overjoyed"