Sunday, June 26, 2005

whatta weekend!


Contrary to having no plans this weekend, this turned out to be a busy and tiring one. Yesterday was my sister's Capping Ceremony (when Nursing students were given their white caps). I was supposed to attend an orientation for the Neil Gaiman volunteers in Fully Booked, Rockwell. (Aack! 13 more days to go!!!) I hope there's another one I could attend. Anyways, since family comes first, I didn't go. We had KFC take out for lunch. We never had that before. It has been a long time since the whole family sat on the dining table to eat. We did that. I was glad. We were planning to have dinner in a pizza place after the ceremony. But since it rained and the program ended quite late, I ended up dialing the phone again and ordering a takeout. But it was still fun.

I thought it would only last for Saturday. But the food kept on coming until today. We were invited for the christening of my nephew, my second cousin's son. My parents are their godparents during their wedding. We attended the baptism and ate lunch at the reception. Hopefully, I'll be uploading the pictures from the digicam really soon and I'll just post a link to the photo album. We haven't taken a lot of pics since the camera ran out of batteries. Yaiks! =(

Patrick Ian Pedres
photo taken using Nokia 6610i

Gawd, I never felt so full since... I guess, last New Year's Eve! Haha! We even watched "Monster in Law" after the reception. But I still wanna watch "Batman Begins". My date with him did not push through because he is not feeling well. Poor guy.


It was almost perfect until my mother informed me she is planning to let my cousin (an uncle's illegitimate daughter) stay here at home and study, let me repeat, study high school! Ok, I know she has good intentions and all. She said it's only for a public school and it's her way of "making it up" to the mother since my uncle decided to create this human being and is stupid enough to abandon the mother and daughter for another woman (whom he eventually married and had another kid with). Still with me? Sounds like a tele-novela right? I just hope they live happily ever after. My mother has this savior-and-redeemer tendency that she wants to make up for her sibling's mistake, but duh? Yeah, DUH?! Her siblings are old enough to know what they're doing and should be mature enough to accept the consequences of their actions.

We CANNOT afford to finance a high school student and at the same time, let her stay in our house. I can just imagine all the expenses-- additional food, allowance, school stuff, books and tuition fees! Aaaaargh! My sister isn't even through college yet! What is she thinking?! If my sister needed money to buy those expensive books, she panics if she cannot find someone who will lend her money. If there were sudden expenses, she gets depressed. If we're broke, she locks herself in the room. And now this?! What's worse, she's expecting me to finance the kid! *breathes deeply*

I don't even know how to react to that. I told her I haven't saved up a cent after 3 years of working in a job I don't even like. I want to save up for myself. I have a life to live too. Unlike you, I don't want to live for other people. I want to live for myself. I want to cherish my young adulthood earning money for myself. I want to be selfish, for a change. I want my own life. If I grow old, I don't want to think I wasted my years. I want to feel how it's like to be free from obligations, for a change. I want to pamper myself. When you told me you want me to marry a rich foreigner (like some of my cousins), I ignored that. I don't want to marry for money. Money, like good looks, is just a bonus point if ever I want to get married. But I'm young. Why burden me with all these obligations that are not even mine to carry? The reason why I'm not having a kid of my own is that I know how expensive it is to raise a child. I cannot afford it. I don't even have a stable career forgodssake! I have lots of plans and dreams that are being put on hold... Actually, most of these dreams already died because of hopelessness...

I could have told her all of these, but I didn't. Like I always mention, I never get to talk back to my mother in an angry tone of voice. Maybe someday I'll learn how, but not today. I just said, "I don't have the money". *sigh* I don't know what will happen next.


loryces said...

does your mother read your blog? hopefully not coz i just want to say nakakainis na sya ha!

~*galenlondeien*~ said...

she does not, and if she is, then she would know why i'm acting this way.

Anonymous said...

I think its totally unfair to you that you should finance the kid's schooling. Your mom should know better. I wish someone can talk to her and let her see your side. Pray to the holy spirit to give her that wisdom.

~*galenlondeien*~ said...

Anonymous: thank you. i promise myself to talk to her once she opens the topic again. we've been through a fight and i don't want to start another one again. i appreciate your advice. :)