Wednesday, January 22, 2003

Passed the second exam. Whew!
Two more to go. Two more difficult ones.

Got the name of my crush at work. I've had about five crushes before with the same name.

Even got his pic from our mugshots. Anyone interested, just email me. Hahahaha!


I have never gone past the silly-schoolgirl-infatuation stage. I wonder why. Is it because of my idealistic nature?

I have always believed in the saying "Aim for the sky and you'll fall on the roof. Aim for the roof and you'll fall on the floor." Someone once told me that we all have set standards for us to follow. In everything, we have a standard. It's a basis for comparison. It screens all things before our senses consciously, subconsciously or unconsciously absorbs them. It's an effort to set a quality or a level of priority for all things seen, heard, touched, smelled, tasted and felt. Sometimes, we meet this standard or even unexpectedly exceed it. But there are times when we fail to reach it. We either get disappointed or we get to accept it and settle for something less.

Will I settle for second best when I know that the best is still out there for me to achieve? But how can I be so sure that the best out there is really for me?


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I have always been the moody type. After a hard day's work, traffic, rush hour, failed plans, cancelled meetings, major exams and a VERY long walk in a high-heeled shoes, the last thing I need is for someone NOT to acknowledge my feelings. Ignore me on other days or on other instances but not now. I am a very sensitive person. The least I could ask is a little sensitivity for me. I'm also human. I get pissed off.


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I feel empty again. I feel sad. I can't pinpoint what exactly triggered it, but I have a vague idea why. It's one of those days when I just stare at nowhere and have an urge to squeeze those tear ducts for no apparent reason at all.


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Someone I hardly know sent me this message last night. Just a thought I might need to ponder on.
"It isn't true that nobody loves you nor likes you. The truth is, you're just blind to see it and numb to feel it because you're busy doing other things with your childish illmanners."
Very funny.

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