I know I'm bombarding this blog with questions, but since I don't have the answers to these, I think it's better to place it here and hope that eventually, I will be able to answer them.

Why is it that there are people who have difficulty loving and giving all his/her heart to another? I mean, just committing to a certain individual. Yes, we love our family, relatives, friends, etc., but they are included in our "comfort zone". We know them. We know that they will accept us no matter who or what we are. I'm talking about giving the entire heart to a special person and taking all the risks and accepting all the consequences that will happen after that.

It's easy to say "I love you" but difficult to show it. It's like sharing your heart to many different individuals but the love is not really strong enough to undergo challenges, since the part given is a small one. You have not decided to commit yourself to that one person. Is it possible to commit to many persons? In my opinion, no.

What will it take to make you decide to give everything? An assurance that the other person will also give you everything he/she has? Is it possible to commit to a person who has not committed himself/herself to you?

I have heard and read a lot of stories of "martyrdom" and many times, I've been told to love unconditionally. But since I'm scared or selfish, I don't want to love without being loved in return. I've had my share of that "martyrdom" since God knows when. Now I'm beginning to realize that my defense mechanism to that is not to fall too quickly. Oftentimes, I hurt feelings if I don't acknowledge them. I crawl to my shell and they won't have the guts to even come near it. That's why they call me insensitive. Hahaha! If they only knew.

But then how would we know when to grab the chance? To completely jump into the cliff without hesitation? I just hope it won't be too late. Too late to realize that person's worth. :(