Tuesday, February 18, 2003

Haunting Past

Some missions accomplished today. Three inches off the length of my hair. My head feels lighter but I saw to it that my hair still is below my shoulder since I know I look bad in short hair. Watched "Maid in Manhattan". Never really liked J-Lo but I think Ralph Fiennes is gorge plus the Cinderella-like story. I deserved that "fairytale" break I guess.

Some pasts just keep haunting me-- that includes my past job. I'm not through with that yet since my former boss still wants me to meet her tomorrow. And I thought I'd be resting the whole day coz I'll be reporting for work tomorrow night. NOT! D'Arvit!

Just saw an episode in a TV show about guys making harana* for girls in the provinces. What if I try going home to the province and staying there? My idealistic nature might find that very amusing. There's also this episode about men cheating their wives through cellphones. Tell me about that. I mean, a first-hand experience for me is enough. (No, I don't have a husband. Let's just say I used to "know" someone who did that.) Another past haunting me. I'm glad THAT's over.

*courting a woman in the form of singing songs as the man visits the woman's house

Something for Someone

I wonder why it's not probable for me to find someone who just makes it feel right. I mean, someone whom I share mutual feelings with. I may feel a deep something for someone but that someone only feels a shallow something for me. Then someone feels a deep something for me but I only feel a shallow something for that someone. Get my drift?

Maybe I am the problem. I have difficulty letting go of a person who means something to me. I am possessive. But I cannot commit myself to one. Am I being unfair? I'm still waiting for the "right" moment. But will it come? What if it already passed my way and I didn't give it a second look? But then if it's the "right" moment, why didn't it make an impact in my life?

This sucks. Dammit. I better stop this. My head is already spinning.

Haloscan still down. Comment boxes still empty. Miss the comments...

august afternoon and the air's aflame
softly on the breeze, thought i heard your name
this morning i'd have thought that it looked like rain
but these clouds have ways of playing games
{whether you are weather like clouds appear and clouds roll by
but if you stay within my sight, fall in love I just might}

~Stephen Speaks, "Weather"

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